7/22/2004

hey guys.

we'll be here for another day, then we're leaving on saturday. not sure what time, but at any rate, i'll be home late late sunday night. jess and i plan on going to the ren faire again on august 21 (day before my birthday, and in celebration thereof). i want everyone to come. yes, that means you two too, james and andrea. and plan to cosplay. >:)

andrea, i read the lyrics. you, i'm sure, along with the rest of my friends, know my stance on lyrics and songs. i maintain that it is fruitless to listen to songs i disagree with - for the most part. generally speaking, i hold to this in rap and r&b/hip-hop. i like some metallica songs purely for the music (but "fuel" doesn't fall into this category, if you're wondering; nothing wrong with that song, far as i can tell). but for me, it's hard to listen to a rap song and completely ignore the lyrics. i can't do it for some rock songs, even.

but i digress.

i agree with you, andrea, but i also agree with ralph. you should get that vomiting thing checked out. ;) i know i'm the only christian in our group, but i've got plenty of clean rap that i like and listen to. not trying to press it on anyone, just sayin'.

ralph, i have not forgotten you, nor are you the least important to me of all you guys. each one of you i like in a different and unique way. :) i understand the cutting, first off. i don't know who else, if anyone, of us cuts; it's just you and me, far as i know. but i for one have tried stopping, and it's working. i've talked a few times with my pastor, and i'm happy to say that God's Word is back in my life, stronger than before. it's seeming to help with avoiding the cutting.

like i said before (or alluded to), you're not a christian, but try something you like. write. read. draw. paint. sculpt. dance. venting (the name was not coincidental) helps, no matter what the form. and please, call me if you feel you've no one to talk to. if i'm available, i would love to talk. it's what i'm here for. i tell every one of you guys this, and it's not vanity, it's not bluster and bluff. i really really do want to talk if you need it. i know depression, and talking helps me. if it's not your thing, fine, but if it is, don't feel that i wouldn't care, because i do.

alright. enough mushy stuff, at least for now. but i mean it when i say i love every one of you guys. when the Bible talks about love, it means the greek agape, a selfless love, a chosen love. that's the love i have for you, all of you. you're my friends, and i would rather die - i mean that - than see you get hurt. that, ralph, includes hurting yourself.

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